Your Guitar Playing does not Impress the Girls

Nerds. Nerds everywhere.

I saw a meme that equates playing the guitar with lefty males. I can’t call them men. As a guitar player; and by that I mean I studied guitar at school, I’ve played for over 40 years, and I’m pretty darn good, I unfortunately know this meme to be mostly accurate. I play the guitar because my parents pushed me into music from a young age. Before the guitar it was the violin which I began playing when I was only 8 years old. I kinda wish I still knew how to play the violin as I’m becoming a bit of a fan of bluegrass music like that of Tim Rice. Anyway, I digress.

It seems that the guitar is now not cool. Let me clue you up, oh hopeless young men out there. The guitar has never been cool. To my shame, I have known a number of women in my life. I can tell you without any hesitation that I have never scored a girl because of my guitar playing. At the best, and I mean the very very best, the guitar playing did not hurt my chances. What I mean for the hard of learning is that if you’re playing a guitar, and you manage to pick up a girl, you will have done it despite the fact that you were playing a guitar.

Girls don’t dig the guitar. Guys think girls dig the guitar because guys dig the guitar. That’s the same mistake that girls make when they think that guys care about their power careers. Girls are very much into famous or on their way to be famous musicians, and that is because of the fame. Not the guitar. Yes, the guitar playing vastly contributed to the fame. But at the end of the day the girls want to be around the famous guy. He could be playing the triangle for all they care.

But guys who whip out the guitar and play and croon with the explicit objective of trying to get the girls are more or less the most cringe thing ever. Even if you are really really good at it, while you’re busy there crooning away, the other guys will be getting with the girls.

I’ve known a lot of musicians in my life, and a high proportion of them were permanently thirsty. Not only were they not good with women, they permanently handicapped themselves by truly believing that if they just tried to impress the girls a little bit more with their guitar playing then by golly they would finally get the girl, any girl, it didn’t matter, just a girl, pretty please.

I play the guitar, and I play in a band. When I get up on the stage I just do my best to smash it out of the park, and then I get off the stage and I don’t refer to it and I’ll just talk about anything else except what went on up on the stage. At the very most I might inquire if the sound was okay. I’ve also got rid of most of my guitars. I just have the very old favourites, one of which I have owned for most of my life. If a guy is boasting about how many guitars he has then he is invariably a deluded twit who is catastrophically afflicted with a permanent case of the great thirst.

If you want to play the guitar then play the guitar. But never ever think for a moment that it will lead to romantic success. Play it down, don’t refer to it, do it as something that you do and that’s it. And that goes for all of our guy hobbies. If a girl is into you then she is into you, full stop. She will like your skills because they show that you are competent. Now excuse me while I go off to look at sick Telecasters on the internets.